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Who needs boundaries?

August 7, 2017

One of the definition of boundaries is to limit areas with lines which the picture assigned to this post makes sense.  An additional definition would be more about setting limit to actions with invisible lines. Boundaries can some times be challenging to enforce, I feel like more and more parents or caregivers nowadays would agree.  I truly don't believe it was that hard for my parents, as a matter of fact I think they found joy in setting and monitoring boundaries.  They were real experts at it.

I see the importance of setting personal boundaries just about as much as I see the importance of personal confidence.  When one has matured enough to recognize and set personal boundaries, it can have a positive impact on positive relationships that are mutually respectful, loving, caring, and supportive. Having personal boundaries reflect that we love ourselves, that we value others we care about, and that our actions reflect our level of maturity.

We do need to make sure we don't confuse boundaries with manipulation.  Boundaries should reflect order and foresight into scenarios and actions.  Manipulation reflects the control over someone.

 Boundaries help children to take responsibility for their actions, attitudes, and emotions.  When teaching children boundaries- make sure that you a TRUSTWORTHY. How do you establish trustworthiness? You have to be consistent, reliable, mean what you say, stay true to what you say.  You need to be specific with what you say, not generalizing or leaving a gray area that could open up room for misinterpretation.  Something else to consider is involving children with discussions and exploration of the boundaries.  They need to understand why they are in place, not neccesarily agree or approve of said boundaries.  After discussion(s), then they must be written, similar to a written agreement/contract, in order to serve as a reminder and be accessible to review.  Like in any contract, you should always have penalties (consequences) and since you're working with children you should incorporate some rewards.

Eventually, it would be our hope that children see the benefits of living within the boundaries that are safe, help us be productive and let's other know we love ourselves.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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